Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Water? I'm THIRSTY, not DIRTY!

Hi, Sarah here.  On Weight Watchers they tell us to be sure to drink lots of water because it's important to keep hydrated blah blah blah... They even give us a healthy checks tab to mark off all the healthy things we do for ourselves every day.  I'm really good at everything except drinking the water.  I'm not thirsty for water because a) I drink about six gallons of diet coke every day and b) water is boring. 

I think I might have to start though, because I don't know why, but since I've started dieting I'm SUPER constipated.  Either I can't go at all, or when I do manage to push something out, they are the size of hummingbird eggs and the consistency of diamonds. (I imagine)

 Not pleasant!  And you know what?  When you can't poop, all you think about is pooping.  I'm at work right now and the kids are at Art, so for 35 precious minutes I don't have to be with kids and I desperately tried to push something out for some relief and all that got pushed out was my old friend Mr. Hemmorhoid and about six hummingbird egg/diamonds. 

I was chatting with a fellow dieter last night on Facebook and she told me she had to go because she has diarrhea.  Oh man, was I jealous.  She doesn't know how lucky she is!  Not only does she have a clean, non-impacted colon, but she's shitting out a lot of poundage! 

Sorry for the poop post, but it IS dieting related and it DOES suck, so there you have it.  I'm going to make bran muffins and drink water all day tomorrow, so I better clear my schedule through the weekend.  Wish me luck!


  1. You could take a stool softener. OMG! We are getting old.

  2. hee hee...i would also suggest some yogurt. it doesn't have to be the fancy poop-yogurt that jamie lee curtis sells us, you can use any and it helps. my mom also swears by sugar free hard candies. you know, the fake sugar can cause major poop-age. it's a win-win; you eat candy, then you poop!

  3. PRUNE JUICE. I tell ya girlie, nothing works better or faster. Very worth the disgusting ass-taste. :oP