Friday, August 19, 2011

Count me in.

Soooooooooooooooo with you here.  I've been eating all the same crappola.  Summer fun?  Who knows.  I chalk it up to the fact that DIETING SUCKS ASS, and after 11 MONTHS of it, I'm sick of thinking about food every minute of my life, much less trying to find the time to care about keeping track of what I'm eating. 

Ah, hell.  Here goes round 27.  If you ladies are game, I'm game.  Can't hurt.  I need something to get me happy. I'm 24 pounds away from my original goal.  I lost the first 16 fairly quickly, when I was sticking to my plan every minute of every day.  I guess that's all I really have to do.  Right?

I still can't eat breakfast without gaining.  It's a weird anolmaly with me.  If I eat before 11:30 or noon, I gain that day.  I have to stick to my one cup of tea in the morning and hold off until I'm starving before eating actual food.  I know, I know.  "My metabolism will stall, my fat-burning furnace won't activate, blah blah blah."  News flash:  My fat-burning furnace has been on the blink since I turned 39.  I don't hold any illusions that eating an egg at 9:00 a.m. is going to magically fix it.

I am still totally on the frozen meal kick.  They keep me on-track with the calorie counting.  Some days I'm so lazy that I just eat three frozen meals and drink tea.  It sounds stupid and boring as hell, but those are the days I lose the most weight!!!  I end up at something like 1000 calories for the day and I'm down 2 pounds the next morning.  Bonus!

Biggest news:  I'm quitting pop.  ALL pop.  It's impossible.  But I'm trying.  I have been so achy and have had such horrible headaches from the artificial sweeteners that I finally gave up diet pop - and the headaches and aching joints COMPLETELY disappeared.  Now if I'm craving a "real" pop I have one - but I don't need it like I used to.  I try not to keep it on hand at home, and I save it for a special occasion like a movie.  This is a HUGE deal for me!  I've been brewing my own raspberry ice tea (LOVE it) and drinking lots and lots of hot teas - all kinds.  It's helping.

The exercise piece SUCKS.  I still can't find time to do the 4 workouts each week that I want to.  It seems that "4" has been my magic number.  If I manage to get 4 workouts in (treadmill or elliptical), the scale drops.  If I only do 3 or less, it doesn't seem to affect the scale in the least.  So, I've been falling into the, "I don't have 4 days available this week, so I'll do ZERO - because less than 4 doesn't do squat for me!"  This, of course, is screwy logic.  

It's also helping me IMMENSELY to take one day at a time, and at the end of the day, wipe my "slate" clean, so to speak.  I wipe away all guilt (if I happened to not do so well with the calorie count that day), all the written evidence of my day's eating (I toss my little calorie-counting paper in the trash when I go to bed, whether it was a perfect day or an awful one...), and then tomorrow is a new day.  This practice is weirdly-empowering.  But it's true - it's helpful to remind myself that each new day can be a new attempt, and a renewed effort on my part.  In this way, if I blow it one day I no longer use it as an excuse to blow a whole week, or more.  I start each day with the intention to make that day a great one... 1100-1200 calories, lots of protein, only healthy carbs, lots of fruits and veggies, whole grains, no junk food, no fast food, no crappola.  It's all helping!  

My goal is to lose 24 pounds by September 17th, which is my 43rd birthday.  I realize it's probably a little too lofty.  But I'm still shooting in that direction.  

Soldier on, ladies!!!

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