Tuesday, February 28, 2012

I'm BACK! And fatter than ever!

It's been a long time but I'm back.  I can't deny it any longer, and I can't continue to test the tensile strength of denim any longer.  I am chunky.  I had to face facts this morning when I was forced to put on a pair of clean jeans because I spilled strawberry short cake all over the pair I had been wearing for days and days, and was planning to continue wearing for days and days.  I really really really didn't want to wear a pair of clean pants today.  You know how it is; those days when you feel extra bloaty (probably from the ginormous piece of cake you had last night) and the thought of slipping into some nicely stretched pants is just plain comforting.  I almost went ahead and wore the dirty jeans again because they are really dark and you couldn't see the stain, but then I thought to myself, "Self, you can't go that low.  Just put on some clean pants."  So I forced my enlarged thighs into the clean pants and if denim fibers were tiny people, they would have linked arms as if preparing for a tsunami, and if those tiny denim fibers could talk they would have said, "CAN'T. HOLD. ON. MUCH. LONGER!" through gritted teeth.  They did manage to hold the line all day, thank goodness, and the pants have loosened considerably throughout the day.  Broken in!  I will not have to put a pair of fresh denim pants on until I loose five pounds, and that, my friends, will make all the difference.

What's my plan THIS time?  Well, the usual.  I'm going weigh myself regularly, track what I eat, and exercise.  Sigh.  Starting tomorrow.  Anne says to cut back on the wheat too.  I'll try that.  But Mama loves her some wheat, so I'm not too optimistic about that.


  1. Welcome back, O' Master of ceremonies! Welcome to the Chunky Pants Parade. I thought I was the only one who (sadly) has 27 pairs of CUTE jeans in her closet that CANNOT BE WORN. Humph.

    I've been yo-yoing since New Years Day. My Mom, sister, and I created a closed Facebook group for the three of us, where we've posted funny dieting pics, motivation, praise, encouragement, support, yadda yadda yadda. It's actually been very good for all three of us. My Mom has lost about 12 pounds, Dana about 20 (of her 50-pound goal!), and I've regained a few pounds the past few weeks, putting me at only about 6 pounds lost since February 13th. I gained FIVE pounds since last Friday! HUMPH.

    So yeah, me, too. Back to it, trying to eat well every day, and some days I manage it, and other days.............I binge. TERRIBLY. Last night, it was a Butterfinger and 20 oz. Coke Classic - AND A BOX OF JOLLY RANCHER GUMMIES - on the way home from work. WTF?!?!?!?!?!