losing it

i skipped a whole week of working out.  i can't believe i just told you that, but it's true: i went to the gym last monday, and today was the first time i've been since then.  exactly seven days of me doing nada, zip, zilch, in the way of working out. 

the gross part?  i totally missed it. 

at first i was just really busy at work, so i didn't go tuesday or wednesday.  then on thursday i almost went into work early to sneak in a work out, but didn't because i worked with a tech i'm not really a huge fan of, and just wanted to stay home until the last possible minute.  then on friday i just didn't feel like it, and then this weekend i went to my mom's house to hang out.  i thought i'd try to work a walk in or something, but ended up spending a lot of time on the couch, knitting and watching cooking shows on pbs.  today on my way home from the island my mom lives on, i went to the gym before i even hit my house, so i wouldn't be able to think of an excuse for not going.  at least, that's what i told my boyfriend.  the truth is, working out at the gym on monday afternoon is rad, and is my favorite time to go.  no one's there, i get all the equipment to myself, and all that self-consciousness i have just doesn't apply.  moreover, that awesome monday feeling totally seeps into the rest of the week.  i think because i'm having good workout experience (as opposed to all the weirdly tense i've had in the past) it's actually changing the way i feel about getting hot and sweaty in public.

i didn't lose any weight this week, as far as i know, because i didn't weigh myself either.  i knew not working out wasn't going to help myself any, so i didn't bother making myself feel worse.  i can tell that parts of me that are soft and fluffy (and fat) are shrinking in a slow and steady ways, and for this week that was enough.  we ate a lot of vegetarian meals this week, not because i was anti-meat, but because we had a lot of good veggies in the house and i was lazy.  i like to think that at the very least i've maintained the status quo, but i guess we'll see when i weigh in this week.

you know, even if i don't end up losing a lot of weight or whatever, i think this working out thing might stick with me.   i never ever ever thought those words would come out of my mouth, but there they are.  i like my little work gym.  i like getting sweaty and how good the shower after a workout feels.  my father in law always says that he's not interested in leaving a good-looking corpse; he says he wants to get every inch, every mile, every moment out of his body that he can.  i can see what he means now.