I feel like crap

Okay, Kristin.  I'll join your club but I'll probably just bawl through every meeting.  Get ready.

I've been on my desperation diet for several days now and it's fucking hard and miserable, like I knew it would be.  I do NOT feel better.  I find myself dragging through the day and so exhausted at night that I go to bed around 9:00.  I think it's because I've been eating about 700 calories a day in an effort to kickstart some weightloss, and also, about half of those calories are coming from protein.  I hate protein.  I like carbs.

I am actually enjoying eating veggies.  I get "ancient" red bell peppers (they are dark red and kind of skinny and long) from Sam's Club and they are delicious.  I also got sugar snap peas which I really like.  I have choked down some cauliflower and broccoli, but I don't know how long I can do that.  I have been eating lots of fish and beef and beans and shrimp.  I haven't had a sugary sweet since I started, (oh wait a minute, Kira made some instant pudding the other day and I ate that) but I don't really miss it that much.  When I haven't been eating sugar for a while, I find it makes me incredibly thirsty when I have something with a lot of refined sugar in it.  Thirsty to the point of discomfort.  Last night we had some tiny steaks I got from Walmart and a salad.  It was good but like I said, I feel like gravity is stronger somehow because I'm so run down.  I couldn't stop myself from having half a mini-bagel in the hopes that it would give me some energy.  It didn't.

I'm thinking about giving up coffee and having tea instead.  I like a hot drink in the morning, but I am getting a little tired of coffee.  It smells good but it tastes like bad breath to me.  And the caffeine boost is a little over the top.

I've been doing good with exercise.  I have gone swimming, did a workout tape, rode my bike, went for a long walk.  Yesterday I took the day off from exercising because I just wasn't up for it.

I think I'm losing weight, but I haven't gotten on the scale yet.  I'm doing that on Friday.  This drastic change in diet has sort of caused a depression relapse which I'm hoping will subside when my body gets used to the healthier me.

So, on the plus side:  I think I'm losing weight.  On the negative side:  I feel like shit physically and emotionally.   If things don't change I might have to revert back to a 90% carb diet again.  Protein is bullshit.